Friday, November 25, 2005


In a previous post called "Size Matters" I remarked on a new type of spam in my in-box.

Penis enlargement patches, in three different strengths, guaranteed (oh yeah) to increase the size of your willy by up to 7 cm (in yer dreams). They came with an exercise manual (guffaw) and I mused on mini dumbbells and a plumb line with weight attached (ouch). I wondered where you put the patches .

Listen carefully, I think I've found the band of merry men who use these.

Jin Sheng is the Grand Master of this group of merry men who call their club Iron Crotch (I do not jest). It consists of approximately 60,000 members (Freudian slip) worldwide who practice the art of Qigong.

What is Qigong I hear you ask? It is the art of lifting hundreds of pounds with your genitals to increase energy and sexual performance. Really, I kid you not. For once I'm glad to be female.

Jin Sheng attached himself to a truck (yes, by his genitals) and pulled it across a car park.

If he keeps this up for much longer he'll be able to sling it over his shoulder and go to his next fancy dress party as a petrol pump, and win the prize.

Sorry guys, I'm going to make your eyes water now. Mine are watering already, but not for the same reason.

The Tri-Valley Herald reports that he first tied a strip of blue fabric around his penis and testicles and tugged to make sure it was on tight.

An assistant then kicked him hard between the legs before he lashed himself to the vehicle.

No sense no feeling then.

Incidentally you stick the patches anywhere on your body. Mr. Sheng probably sticks his on the hairiest most tender bit of his body (I'll leave you to work that one out) just so he can enjoy the pain when he rips it off.

I suppose it keeps them out of mischief.



Blogger Gavin Corder said...

I've got a bit of challenge going here
wanna help out?

8:32 PM  
Blogger Gavin Corder said...

Incidently re: your post...bloody hell!

8:33 PM  
Blogger colcam said...

Size matters was bad enough,this is too funny - and eye-watering in the male sort of way.

My God woman, you're obsessed!

11:50 PM  
Blogger kats said...

No Colin, just amused by it all.

By the way this has been filmed for a Channel 4 Documentary called Penis Envy.

Just in case you think I'm making it up!!!


8:29 AM  

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